Sunshine blogger :-)

It was unbelievable that within a short passage of time someone nominated me for the Sunshine Blogger Award.

The Sunshine Blogger award is β€œgiven by bloggers to bloggers who inspire positivity and creativity in the blogging community”. I was nominated by BiggerThanMeMovement-> https://biggerthanmemovement.com Please make sure you stop through to read his content…

& Follow him while you’re riding over there & I promise you will NOT regret to being there πŸ™‚

His posts are amazing and touched my heart deeply . More importantly- bigger than me movement had the courage to share his experiences but Moreover he/she read carefully and try to understand others perspective also with a melted heart. The comments of his/her on my posts are full of gratitude and genuine.

I love when someone appreciate my writing and try to suggest me to write better.

Therefore, I do and will always cherish my very first Sunshine Blogger Award & I am grateful for you biggerthanmemovemnt to choose me.

I am a newbee here on this platform but my writing are with me travelling all along.

Soon will update more powerful article to you & through my writings I always try to make people’s lives better .

Well , in this short lapse I receive many likes and comments from many of the bloggers and every likes and comment of your are very close to my heart.

With a whole lot of sincerity in my heart- I would like to thank (and nominate) the following bloggers for being so instrumental in my growth as a blogger:-

Please go through these links and read their words 😊 πŸ‘‡

Biggerthanmovement

https://wp.me/paCMfr-aM

Copypowerblog

https://wp.me/p7NYv9-r5

inspirechange27

https://wp.me/pa3bzq-je

Hangsika

https://wp.me/paPxMt-k

Writingmyheartout

https://wp.me/pa90m3-ef

Thoughtyone

https://wp.me/pac3yq-3Q

Sameerauthor

https://wp.me/paOAz6-1w

Anamikaisblogging

https://wp.me/p9tn5G-fc

Baffled mum

https://wp.me/p9CjaV-z2

Amankumar

https://wp.me/p9oUnz-bi

Indian first

https://wp.me/p8lxlu-8Y

Award Rules:

Thank the blogger and provide a link to their site.

Put Award logo on your blog.

Nominate the others.

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She is gone & now it’s your time (part 2) … βœ

Dear Depression,

I can almost see you when I stare deep into their eyes.

I see the pain they hold deep within. They have seen better days but you πŸ™‚ oh my dear, you just swept them away and keep them in real quick.

Came in like a ghost, creeping in when nobody dared to put their wings up…

You didn’t come alone though.

You, yes you, of course, you invited everyone to the hell party in which they never wanted to be IN.

Anxiety, fear, failures all are standing at a corner talking about how the next hell party will be like.

Depression you stand at the door inviting others IN.

While they are forced to stand there and keep supporting you but behind you, they talk with each other about the truth – the truth that they don’t like being there at your party to kill someone without noise.

They have made a point to me over and over that they have genuinely wanted to leave but you still sucking them in deeper and deeper into your deep hell hole.

They laugh on the outside but they cry deeply, screaming but nobody hears them at the hell party.

They tell me how lonely they are standing to support you but I am always by there side and wonder how this could be if they are not going to support you.

Perhaps anxiety and fears know their host and for them, I am not a good a company – I think to myself.

Anxiety holds there hostage inside their head.

They build a fort around themselves to prevent invasion.

Sleeping with the lights on so they don’t lose themselves in the dark and scary nights.

But depression, you are already darkness in their life.

Insecurities flow like a river so they prefer to stay out of harm.

They constantly look over their shoulder while walking down the streets.

Asking how they look every single time to everyone’s who looks at their way and although they are pretty they don’t think much of themselves.

They are just the years old they never imagined to be.

In fact, they had imagined their whole life a lot different and now they are that one who has a whole lot of issues and problems πŸ™‚

They have become a stranger to their own self and only they can find the light at the end of the tunnel but you the bloody depression, you never want them to find the tunnel end.

Depression oh you depression, you have taken them through this roller coaster of emotions and just when they think the coast is clear, there you are again!

Surprise! I insist you leave them alone and I know they must want it too, but you the hell keep them with you.

Your existence may mean nothing to the world,
Yet your existence means everything to them who welcoming and let you in and destroying them completely…

O depression you are great, you take many lives but now I will not let you take the life of other’s one.

I swear to you, I keep standing with all those who are dealing with you

Believe me, I kill you without noise,

I show you the way out of my own one’s life.

P.S:- Congratulations to the people who read this. I wish this article End the phase of all negative thoughts and give you the new beginning.

As I always say -> power_to_you.

Cheers! πŸ™‚

She is gone (part 1) … βœ

Whenever she calls me she always smiles, She smiles at the fullest.

We talk not just for ten or twenty minutes but our talks takes at least one complete hour.

I am amazed that how she hide her pain inside her talks and try to make me laugh.

She is my one and only best friend who knows me very well and for her I probably am the one.

But the worst thing about me is that I prefer to message instead of calling and she hates that.

Still in a month she calls me with herself and shouts on me that why I didn’t call but after listening to my old dialogues she starts talking with me and then I share my happenings with her.

She is different yes she’s…

The way she discusses her problem with me and looking for a perfect solution from my side is always making us close.

Her voice clearly reveals the truth that whether she is happy or not but when I insist her to say she hesitate to share – because sometimes I literally do busy in my own stuff which gives her a sense that I am not genuinely interested in her happenings, but that’s the half-truth because I never want her to be in pain and she knows that.

I always tell her to talk to more people and enjoy the goodness of social media to keep herself busy,

Because being alone and being only with a family, partner, and some friends is not a good idea,

One needs to explore the goodness in people and share his/her feelings, but she never understand & backfires me with the saying that I (me) feel bored to talk to her so I say that to talk to others,

and again that is not the truth, I simply share the things with people, which helps me to make myself and themselves better.

But generally people take good things in negative ways, they think that the person who gives something or share something is for sure having some secret agenda or it is nonsense to adopt, sometimes maybe it is the reason but sometimes it is not for sure & for me its perfectly not for sure,

But she knows about my anxiety,

She knows how I cry in between talks when in pain, and she always console me by saying the same to me that stay away from negativity, but she doesn’t know why I didn’t call her many times – because sometimes her negativity very easily transfer into mine.

So, I talk less to make both of us feel better but I helping her whenever she interact with me because Some people in our lives are truly wanted our happiness like family which generally played a negative role in many of the children and in my friend live too, but I know her family wants her good but she didn’t feel it,

She thinks they don’t understand her,

Her age is twenty-five now and I feel the same anxiety when my family keep chanting daily to marry, but the difference in between her and me is that she smiled and keep her anxiety inside and do not share her interest and thoughts with her family but I do,

I do talks to my family no matter what kind of thoughts but I say what I want to because I have a belief that my parent never wants anything bad for me and I told her to talk at least few things bad to her family but at least spit out.

But she always makes her family happy by sayings jokes and all but never tries to talk to them about her dislikes.

She is strong but deep inside I know she is weak, I see her pain when she says that her parent searching a groom for her and suddenly from one emotion to other, she laughs and says that if I don’t like him I say “I am sorry you are ugly ” and again we both laugh.

She is awesome.

Well, I am awesome too because I am more outspoken than her when it comes to my dislikes.

But her caring and laughing nature in every negative situation is what makes her beautiful, that is why whenever she calls I spell out all my worries and frustration first and then she do the same, as because it makes her feel that now I am empty and ready to listen to her worries more attentively with a punches of laughs in between.

Last time I remember we talk about many things but the main topic we talk about is sharing and caring.

We both are having the same traits and feeling in this, we want our family and loved one’s happiness more than others and that doesn’t mean that we both want bad for others but we try to make our family’s proud first and I think that is the most prominent and important thing in our life.

But she always said that I give and give and give but I didn’t get and I know what she means, I know.

Every creature on this earth want affection and when the person only gives her love, power, time to others and didn’t get back all this for a long time, he/she feels habitual but deep inside her heart is not working fully.

And that is the truth and I mean it.

I know how it feels when your expectations are not fulfilled many times.

I know how she feels when she said why God is not listening to my prayers, why not for a single time.

I don’t know what exactly she refers to because our problems are much more in counting than our happiness.

But I always said to her that everything happens for good and will soon happen, let yourself make belief to this, and she interrupts me with a loud and serious mode that no, not with everyone.

I see all those negative vibes she is in prison with.

I didn’t meet her for almost a decade but our calling section is enough to understand each other because somehow we both are related.

I can’t do much for her by sitting far but all I do everything for her to get out of this situation.

I told her to keep all her negative thoughts beside and replace it with positive thoughts but she laughs again and said to me that stop being childish, but this time I shout more than her and in a serious way …

( & for a second I go back to the time when how my love always said me this on a daily basis to stop imagining all the negative scenarios in mind and make the mood worst for the things which never going to happen, I laugh but he diagnose my problem of anxiety and always supports me and show me the affection just opposite of the negativity I have, but the processes of making imagination worst is continuing but today’s the change in me is not easily seen by everyone but the change is definitely in me, I do fight with my demons on a daily basis and replace my negatives with positives. )

I told her that when you can imagine the negative so easily then why can’t you challenge yourself to imagine positively, and she laughs and said because it never gonna happen.

& again I can’t slap on the phone, So I calmly said to her that do it one or two times daily for me as an exercise and then call me.

The chat is over but my mind keeps boggling about the brain game.

Well, the anxiety is a phenomenon phase in human life and people who didn’t understand name it a mental disorder how cool is that, Amazing.

It’s been a month pass even I think two as she didn’t call me, but WhatsApp is still active and she is available there but instead of sending each other quote, morning message and funny texts we didn’t share more or talk more because of my busy schedule.

I know she is waiting for my call but she also knows that she can type a message like she types quote and all those funny memes and laugh in between but I am a bitch she know, I prefer texting over calling.

But after a day passing in betwen the month, I miss her & I want to talk to her but I also have a lots of stuffs and happings in life which I want to share but I can’t,

but the day finally I call her…

Her mother picks the phone and it never happens in a decade when her mother picks the phone.

She is gone.

Gone forever…

I never ever pardon myself for the things which I do or I didn’t do for her.

But that bloody depression kills her & kills her slowly and without noise …

Her laughs are not genuine neither it will be for me.

She is a survivor, She is bold, She is beautiful, She is crazy and I am blessed to have a friend like her & will always have.

To be continued

Friendship or Love ?! How to manage both … βœ

Today I am going through some of my friends posts – posted that its better to have friends than to have a lover.

But still they prefer sex , they prefer late night talks , they want someone to stand by , they want to lean on someone special …

The real question I want to ask to those is that – Like whether you want sex with friends or with someone or like what kind of relationships you want

I don’t understand those people like if all those things are also your necessity than why you compare friends and lover on the same scale.

*My posts is truly about how to manage friendship and love at the same time*

Love means not only a physical bonding in between two, But it also means that you can share a enormous exchange of thoughts with each other both physically , mentally and conceptually.

But why there is a need of friends?

The answer is simple – Friends are not actually physically closed but they are the part of our life and our growth for sure.

Sometimes we can’t tell many a secrets to our lover because we scared of their reaction or because we think if we tell them the truth , may be they become sad & at that time a true friend need is indeed – To talk To share or To spend some good as well as bad things with them because they don’t have that much expectations to us like our lover.

But what if you ignore your loved ones just because of your friends?

& share all your life experiences with friends like it is to be personal , professionals included all and every single thing.

& what about when mostly of your time you only share with your friends gossiping & intimating with them?

& unwantedly you put a banner of friendship on your head and run around a world with your friends?

& when you came by your lover then becoming like sad all the time or if you are happy because of your friends than try to make your lover also happy that time?

Do you think this way a relationship work in between two parties ?

Do you think this is completely right as to be that much closer to your friends than to your lover?!

Well , for me – Lover is not only for sex or to keep them privately so that no one can know that you are committed but also they have some respect “do give them” , show the world that as like friends they are also the important part of life…

& if you can manage your life in this way then why the mishaps arisings .

Think in that way

And respond to me if you think I write correctly.

For me I think one cannot measure every relationship on the same scale & Everything needs a proper way to lean on.

Pulwama attack … βœ

14/02/2019

Everything was going so easy and calm.

I am feeling little bore in home because I am not celebrating valentine’s Day , So I do keep scrolling my phone because it is the only friend i have in my lone time , Sudden I got the news that there is an attack in jammu and kashmir (India) , where 40(approx) people killed in pulwama attack.

And I was just turn on the television to watch that what exactly is being happen ?! And that was literally a heartbreaking news and view.

Terrorists ?!.

I don’t know what these people want exactly …

When the countries like India busy in thinking about development , climate change issues , corruption , ranking , technology Innovation , etc …

These pakistan and its terrorist come with a bang having a confused thinking of exactly what they want ?

Actually they are uneducated , they only grow with hatred inside and being growing in all the negative environment , who don’t have any moto regarding his/her life and the only thing they want is destruction , even they don’t know that their destruction cause them a self destruction too , pity on those people.

I am so depressed , that where all this mentality and thoughts of attacker lead this world ,

Look at the above image where many of people laugh on the attack , and what more disgusting and sad is that many of them belong to our country india.

I am saddened when my own countryman laugh on that attack and give a name it to hindu and Muslim or kasmiri riots or battleship …

It is not about hindu and muslim , our country and being its countryman I never thought about to destroy any of the whole nation with just a boom.

Never , Because India is country where not its own people but other country’s people are also welcomed as its own people.

So our thoughts and mentality is also same , we never want to harm anyone.

But I am shocked when our own countryman shouting and laughing and making laugh of our soldiers and praise pakistan terrorism for doing this.

I am having no words.

I want to tell you two of the real incident of my life , where it shows that how a hatred lead to destruction and how a love can change this world too….

Case 1:- I am a teacher and in my school there were majority of Muslims students (this is the true story , which i think is important to tell you all) and everyday when in the morning we were starting our national anthem some of the Muslims children weren’t sung it …

One or two time I ignore this or I didn’t pay that much attention because I think may be they do not learn it , but finally one day I ask them that why don’t you sing the national anthem ?

And they didn’t respond , but their expression seems not good.

As the school located not at the good place and parents also not that much educated so they also came with childrens and stand till end of the prayer in school at the campus gate.

And our school allowed it because it newly opened there.

So , after seeing the same habit of these Muslims children’s daily I call girls in cabin because they are very close to me and then I ask them that why don’t they sing national anthem in assembly ?

And their reply make me blank

And even it blank you also if you are truly indian.

And today i want to share it to you all, because it is not about Pakistanis and terrorist and Hindus , Muslims and whatever but it is about mentality.

She(Muslim) said my parents said that these Hindus are devil and if you sing the anthem your khuda didn’t pardon you and still if you sing that anthem we don’t pardon you , and that time I said nothing and tell her to go in the class.

Now Look how these uneducated people mentality is ?

This is not truly about Muslims in our country , I only bold this word Muslim because majority of Muslims are uneducated or may be intentionally they support Pakistan or I don’t know what …

So before put finger on Pakistanis we have to deal with our people mentality and thoughts.

Because being lived in India , means your body n soul have to be proud fully , and i bet you that there is no country like India , who gave you that much freedom to talk , to walk and to do whatever you want to.

And people like this mentality shouldn’t be allow to live in this country , I truly and boldly said this.

The government , The citizens of India need to pay attention on this type of ill people who are more poisonous then these terrorist.

Because if you do not then more jaish- e-Mohammad will do attcaks and born in our own country who destroyed our nation completely….

Case 2 :- Many of my colleagues are muslims and we are very good friends who sharing food , talking about many important issues , our religion facts etc , if we can’t tell about our caste , you don’t able to find who is Hindu and Muslim ( for some cheap mentality people)

One day our Hindus deity maa durga navaratri festival is starting in october and some of our hindu take full day fast for the goddess …

And I too that day having fast , so when i go to school i told my muslim friend that i am having fast , so today i am not going to eat anything.

And sudden her reply make me blank …

She said my father (muslim) we put a tanker near our house so that any of the hindus passing on these days having fast , it is for them.

Her reply made me feel so proud that thank god apart from religions riots there are some educated people are still there who think far beyond this caste and creed when it comes to humanity.

These cases shows that how a education plays an important role in one’s life and above that its one’s thought and mentality is important since childhood , to make him/her a better human.

May people get sense of humanity.

May education will help to change people’s evil thoughts.

May our pulwama attack martyr rest in peace , and we as a country we’ll promise to you that your blood will not go in vain.

May our country’s live long…

#Pulwamaattack #Stopterrorism #Pray #education #Upgradeyourself

Jaan bhi deni padegi to denge ,

( To give ours life ,we give )

Aae watan tere liye.

( Just because of you our beloved country )

I am an Indian and I am proud of it.

JAI HIND …

Relationship or Rape, The connection in between … βœ

I never want to write on this topic but somehow I go throughly over many situations where it’s important to share to all women’s about this …

Rape is such a distorted phase of any women life which make her completely destroyed , it is not defined by a single definition of unwanted distortion done to her body by those bloody bastards who somehow stole the identity of victim and try to harm her ,

Nor it is about those whom who blackmailing you to offer your body to him…

But it is also about those women’s who are at the age of newly born youth and get intimate to opposite sex and follow her dream in someone’s eyes to create a spark to her life, it is also about those who are in long relationship with someone’s for so long and believe that one day her relation is worth in a coming phase …

But wait , what happen?

When the time comes to bind with each other , the relationship get out of the track,

What about she who gave her soul in those hand who she think that it would be grown as a bond between two and about those promises which she made before physically interact .

Attraction? Lust? Love? Promises?

All go in vain now …

She is not virgin anymore!

Like she has no power to generate because she stood like a moron in front of a man whom she trust for a long?

Yes absolutely, this rape has more echoes then the previous ones.

Because the victims doesn’t know till the end what happen to her, neither she found a proper remarks to tell anyone that what she done with the only ones for a so long ,

Whom results come as nothing but a remorseful situation which she can’t understand by her own.

Such a tragedy…

A man is truly born to be a protector but also he has a power to damage you , like Indian mythology said this and we all know this.

But what if you trust someone’s wrong in your whole life?

What if you didn’t listen to anyone?

What , when your only priority is the person who ditch you now?

This is truly a kind of self made destruction, that is why it is very important to you – to choose a man wisely,

A man who treat you as your family like he treat his mother, daughter and sister at home.

Is a man you can rely at an early age but yes no one can see future thou,

Give your harmones a pause before interacting and being misguided by thinking ‘ that this interaction will lead your relationship till end..

No matter what the situation is ,

No matter what the circumstances…

A true man know how to take care of a women , he never try to be physical when he truly don’t know about his future ,

And if may be he find a partner in you and touches your soul again and again , then he never return back and plotting a game to how to get rid from you ,

He never do such kind of things & of course this is not a love also …

I think it is important to tell you and write about that ,

That many girls are found themselves in the same situation where she can’t tell what happened to her,

It is not about you but about many lives who are in danger of these kind of man , who use you according to their need and mood.

Save yourself from such kind of rape which makes your soul dead.

I wish you share this more and more and save adolescents from this.

πŸ™ More power to you women πŸ™

Feelings … ✍

I had accepted the fact that I deserved the way he treated me. I deserved to be treated like shit. I could accept anything just to keep him. He was my home away from home and I was scared of going out on the streets by myself. I was scared of the past, the present and the future.

I still vividly remember that day when he walked away. I remember how he told me not to call him and turned and just left. I remember every moment. I didn’t cry because for the first time I felt confident that it wasn’t my fault. I learnt how to live without him, how to live alone.

The greatest thing I have learnt is to keep quiet. People will blame you for there mistakes because they are cowards. After months of cribbing, a few panic attack’s and a lot of tears, I learnt how to keep quiet and forgive someone who doesn’t even feel guilty. I grew up.